Who has ownership if an asset is obtained after separation? What happens when child custody is not determined during the divorce? And is there any legal advantage to being the spouse who files the divorce? Host Lee Rosen and guest Ketan Soni, managing attorney with Rosen Law Firm, answer listener questions and go over five critical things to do before you get married.

What options do you have if you think your spouse is planning on leaving the country with your marital assets?  Attorney Holly Gray and  host Ned Daze answer listener questions on the issue and discuss the options that are available.  The team also goes over the article 5 Things That You Should Do Before You Even Think About Getting a Divorce.

What exactly does a separation agreement cover? Is it a binding contract? Can you write one on your own?  Ketan Soni, managing attorney with Rosen Law Firm’s Charlotte office and Ned Daze cover the basics of separation agreements, as well as delving into how “no-fault” divorce states like NC differ from states like New York, where fault is a criterion.

Is there really a difference in the way that big county courts and judges operate versus those in smaller counties?  Ketan Soni, managing attorney with Rosen Law Firm’s Charlotte office, Scott Allen, head of litigation with Rosen Law Firm’s Raleigh office and host Lee Rosen discuss the differences between the two as well as taking listener calls and questions on alienation of affection and discussing what you can do if a lawyer is just too expensive.

Custody battles can be one of the toughest and most painful aspects of a divorce but what can you do if your spouse takes off with the children?  Host Lee Rosen and attorney Holly Gray discuss the options that one can take with regards to child custody.  They also answer listener questions about cohabitation during separation.

Rosen.com features a divorce forum where people post questions that are answered by a Rosen attorney.

Earlier today the following question was posted (be sure to read the second paragraph):

“A sticky question. My stbx is working on a separation agreement and wants to include a loan against his 403B account as marital debt. This loan was taken out to pay off our taxes, one of his credit cards and partially one of mine. Technically, if it were a regular loan it would be marital. However, the payments and interest that he pays goes directly back into his retirement account. How would this be looked at by the courts?

Also, we had a signature loan that paid for me to have breast augmentation 2 years ago. He is trying to not include that loan as he claims that what it was used for could be argued as “personal property.” I just say that it is still a signature loan and is marital debt, and he just has a personal issue with paying for my “breasts.” Does he have a leg to stand on?

Thanks for any help.”

Rosen attorney Helena Nevicosi responded as follows:

“The loan from the 403B would be included as a marital debt, basically you would divide the retirement account based on the present value and make him responsible for making future payments against the account. If he agreed to the debt that was incurred for the breast implants that it is likely that will be considered a marital debt.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm”

Lets say the parents have agreed to meet at the halfway point to exchange the children. How do you know where halfway is? And how do you find a good spot there – like a Pizza Hut – or a sushi place?

Try Meetways. It’s a free, hosted product that will find the halfway point and places of interest in that vicinity. Perfect solution to the kid hand-off problem.

The terms “custody” and “visitation” have been outlawed in Florida effective October 1. They have been replaced with “parenting plan” and “time-sharing schedule”. Other words like “Plaintiff” and “Defendant” have been replaced with “Mom” and “Dad”.

While some may think these changes are trivial – I disagree. The language of child custody has a huge impact on the outcome of many negotiations. Emotional, upset parents sometimes care more about the language of custody than they do about the actual time sharing. I have witnessed the breakdown of negotiations when the schedule had been agreed upon but the labels applied to the schedule were unresolved. If changing the words helps kids then it seems like a good move. Congratulations Florida.

Great post on car insurance at Pennsylvania Family Law from Fox Rothschild. In North Carolina, if your liability insurance is permitted to lapse you lose your license plates for a period of time – that makes your car an expensive piece of metal that can’t be driven.

This is an issue that is easily overlooked in the chaos of separation and some parties cancel the insurance in spite.

The New York Times ran an interesting article last week that invesitgates why some people rush into either marriage or divorce not because of love, but health benefits.

While there is no record just how often this happens, lawyers say they are seeing cases on a regular basis where couples marry or divorce in part so one spouse can obtain or maintain health coverage.

How do you go about initiating a divorce? Before having a conversation with your spouse, you need to prepare yourself. Experts recommend having a vision beforehand. What’s your intention? How do you want it to turn out? Also, work out any frustrations you have before the conversation takes place.

While breaking up is hard to do it can get ugly during times of recessions and bear markets.

“Recession has always been a factor raising divorce rates,” explains University of Chicago Business School economist Gary Becker.

Based on Becker’s 1977 studies, which were published in the Journal of Political Economy, couples that experience any sudden significant and unexpected change in income — positive or negative — are at risk of divorce.

I just read an interesting piece in USA Today that explores the rules of infidelity.

Is infidelity just about having an affair or does infidelity also involve having lunch everyday with a coworker of the opposite sex? If you abstain from a physical relationship are you safe from being accused of cheating?

Marriage experts say that infidelity can exist even if adultery isn’t part of the picture.

In today’s world, what do you think are the rules of infidelity?

Are adulterous affairs morally wrong? Based on the 2006 Pew Research Center survey, A Barometer of Modern Morals, 88% of the public said it was morally wrong to have an affair while married.

The survey also revealed that most people felt cheating on your spouse was worse (on the moral compass) than cheating on your income taxes.

Coming in the lowest on the moral compass was gambling and overeating.

Some jewelers are now offering special divorce rings especially designed to help the divorcee move on and emotionally heal. Some rings are even being sold with inspirational poetry cards.

The divorce ring hasn’t gone mainstream yet, but it’s gaining in popularity.

According to the Pew Internet and American Life Project, 1 out of 10 adult Internet users have blogs and many now use it as a way to express discontent in their marriage and document their divorce.

Some experts say during times of marital strife, blogging can be very therapeutic.

In light of the slump housing market, divorcing couples are finding they are unable to sell their home. As a result, some couples are actually taking turns living in the marital residence until they can sell it.

Because of this, divorce experts say splitting up is harder to do.

Do you think the housing market is impacting your divorce?

I just read an interesting article in the Wall Street Journal about women who hold professional degrees and their respective rate of divorce.

According to a soon-to-be-published study by Washington & Lee University School of Law Prof. Robin Fretwell Wilson, women with M.B.A.s are twice as more likely to divorce than men.

The study surveyed over 100,000 professionals in the fields of business, law, and medicine. Prof. Wilson’s conclusion was that professional degrees were hazardous to a women’s marital health.

Prof. Wilson’s study showed women who hold law or medical degrees divorce less than those with only a bachelor’s degree. However, they divorce more than their male counterparts (that is 10% of women with law degrees and 9% of women with medical degrees, compared with 7% of male lawyers and 5.1% of male doctors).

The study also showed women with M.B.A.s to divorce or separate more often than women with hold only bachelor’s degrees (that is 12% of female M.B.A.s compared with 11% of women with only bachelor’s degrees).

Here are five ways to save tax money during a divorce from an article that recently ran on Fox Business where Lee Rosen of Rosen Law Firm is cited:

1. Reach agreements with each other
2. Decide the best way to file your taxes
3. Preserve assets
4. Choose who will claim the children
5. Follow up on beneficiary forms after the divorce

In light of the Eliot Spitzer incidence and the fact that his successor, David Patterson, also admitted to having an affair when he and his wife were going through a rough time, many question whether we as a society are too forgiving of these kinds of acts.

Some argue that the incidence of adultery is ever increasing and that the media is to blame.